fleeting moments

I went to him to ask one of the doubts that I spent almost half an hour and didn't see any hopes of solving the problem .

When he lifted his head and looked into my eyes, he lifted his hands from his laptop, turned around his chair and said " yes tell me". For a moment, I forgot why I was there. What sort of man is he. He makes me forget what I want to tell and mutes me with his beauty. Fair thick fingers, moving against the keys on a small laptop where his cute huge fingers are struggling to type what they want to type without typing the wrong keys.

Ahhhh. Why can't I just forget that I have a crush on him, get done with business and go back home. I brought back the composure, paused for a moment and said " Sharon, can you help me with this?" We spoke for about ten minutes and I left. 

Never ever ever has he ever shown his male ego to me. He has always taken care of me like his absolutely own. Today on the meeting, I had an opinion equal to him which is rare. I love it. I love my work and my work with an intelligent man like him. He never fails to amaze me. 

My boyfriend calls me. Rather, ex boyfriend. I tell him, don't call me Naveen it's over. I am not coming back to you I don't want to do that. I don't have to explain you why. So stop. He says okay I'll not call you again but do think or me once before you move on. Give me another chance. 

After a very satisfying work day, I am on my bed thinking about what Sharon might be thinking. Does he like me? Does he ever try to look at me? That day when I wore a chrisp cotton yellow shirt with printed pastel flowers, he took a look at me in a room full of delegates. I missed a heart beat. That memory will remain as if it happened yesterday,through out till I stop breathing some day. May be he likes me too? Or admires? Does he have a crush on how I look? When I wear palazzos, I have caught him a few times looking at me from top to bottom. But never gave any his class. It just seems like he was casual or equally intensely looking at me with lust ? I will never know the answer and it sucks me into the reality and everything fades away as a dream. 

Sharon always wears the same shade of clothes. His trousers are either 💙 bluex oh wait. It's only blues, there's not even a black pants ever worn by him. He never wears casual. He's always in a hair that is forever sit the same sleek and shining cut up to perfect length. His shoes are always glistening clean. When does he find time to do all this with his kid and wife? How is he so so irresistible.

I don't have any answer. What if I ask him to regrow that hair style which he had a few years ago? Shall I go and tell him, Sharon, can you do that hairstyle you had a few years ago? You look very handsome in that hairstyle. Shall I tell him? How can I ? Will it just means compliment or will it means I'm eying a married man which I know that I will never get, I don't want to get. I can never see him in pain even for a day. 

Sharon walks in. He smells good today. As always. His perfume never changed in the last five years I have worked with him. How is he so constant? He's an old soul. Always in blue color, always smelling good, always being nice to people. 

There were times I tried to get close to him, not physically. I dare. I would say it's not even getting close. It's more like, trying to be friendly. 

Nickis looking at me with confusion lust and shy through his piercing eyes. I'm standing there wearing a crown made of wild colors flowers and colourful butterflies tingling my base skin stomach and above. I can imagine how I'd have looked with a little heavier side round breasta and two deep ariolas. The next second I was shocked, confused shy embarrassed and trying to find clothes to cover my body. Nick walked away. He was in the office though and I don't know where I was. 

I woke up that morning with a pumping heart. Oh it's just a dream but such a sweet one! I can never get Nick ever in my life, but this dream relt so good ! Like relieving a struck rabbit finally escaping the entrapment and running away for freedom. No I cannot do that. Crushing on Nick is just a story in books and mind which can never become a reality. But but.. just knowing whether even Nick has a crush on me should put my throbbing heart to ease knowing the fact that even Nick liked me.. but I can never know that. 

Well, he just walk past by me and this time I couldn't help but look at him. He looked fresh, today his hair in the middle of the head had rebelliously standing against the rest of his hair which were sitting in their place as if agreeing to the orders of his master to sit quiet. He is so authoritative.